Tuesday, August 3, 2010

The Right and Wrong Way to Get Out of a Fight

Woohoo! I almost got into a fight today! With a muscular bloke no less. Here's a totally unbiased first-person account of what transpired at around 9:48pm on Tuesday, August 3 2010.

So I was hooping at an indoor basketball court with 4 other friends against some other teams. I must say my performance was respectable: grabbing lose balls, defensive rebounds, deflecting passes, making 2 back-to-back game-winners, the first with a beautiful sandwich screen from my teammates D.Howard and Timmy (of South Park fame, not the Spurs); the second a go-ahead three from the top of the key to rally back from down 8 or so to win it 22-19. Ok, I was, as 2pac would say, balling!

Then in the last game to run out the clock to 10pm, an altercation occurred between myself and a muscular bloke on the opposing team who weighed about 200 pounds and benched at least 40% of his bodyweight. I don't even remember what happened, but just before, we sparred over a charging foul on me. Some words were exchanged, regular banter, nothing serious. Or so I thought...

On the next play down, Butch lost the ball in the post, I ended up with it, turned around, he was there to meet me, I felt a shove, I shoved back and passed the ball to D.Howard. The next thing I know, Butch was all up in my face!

Hordes of people came over to stop him from clobbering me as he yelled, "What? What? What?" I walked away. He pushed on. One guy from the opposing team approached me and repeated, "It's just a game, It's just a game." I continued walking away.

As Butch's nerves subsided, I reached out my hand, smiled and apologized for the physical play and he proceeded... to remove his shirt! For a second there, I thought he was really going to do me in. I didn't look at his exposed upper body but I didn't like my chances either. He had those scary muscles on the neck, which must come in handy when watching television from an awkward angle. Then, he proceeded to walk off the court and left!

So to summarize, Butch was not having the best game, argued an offensive foul call, attempted to fight the chubby fellow wearing #24 with the sweet jumper, changed his mind after some persuading from skinny teammates, took his shirt off, and ejected himself from the game.

I felt terrible and confused... Terrible for how stupid Butch will feel when the whole sequence replays in his mind tonight and confused by his choice of actions.

I mean... why'd he take his shirt off? Did he know he took his shirt off? And why did he walk off the court afterwards? Did he realize he took his shirt off and thought, "Crap! Now that I've taken my shirt off, it'd be too embarrassing to put it back on so I might as well leave and hit the showers. Wait, is that Chubby 24's extended arm of no hard feelings? Bah, screw him! My shirt's off so I better get going."?

So many questions...

Anyways, special thanks to my teammates for making me feel better after ruining what could have been an undefeated run:

B.Roy - Good thing we're on the same team now... I'd hate to have to guard your ass!
Rondo - Nothing fancy, nothing gained!
D.Howard - You did your business on defense and the boards tonight!
Timmy (again, of South Park Fame, not the Spurs) - You played hard bro! Ain't nobody goin' cut you slack for having Grandpa's knees.

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