Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Deify the False
Just watched "The Invention of Lying", a movie starring Ricky Gervais, one of my favorite comedians and writers of all time. Very talented and genuinely narcissistic.
The movie imagines a world where lying was never invented, and many comical scenarios play out in the most outrageous ways, finally leading up to the creation of a pseudo religion. Gervais is an outspoken atheist and this is clearly an indulgent plot development.
I remember the worst beatings I got from mom was for lying. Alas, physical punishment must not have worked on me, for I too am a violator of honesty. Lying has become so grossly pervasive in our lives, that we ENJOY raveling in deceit.
I'll be the first to admit, that I absolutely adore women's cleavage. I just love it! The line of sight down the middle of two spherical mass of flesh and the suggestion of what treasures lie waiting beneath is such a turn on. C-cup? D? E?? Or the Holy Grail of Grails, Double-D's??? Alas, even A's and B's can turn into fountains of fantasy with implants and push-up bras. The treachery!
Still, I don't enjoy it any less!
Until the truth comes out, of course... Then you're just plain disappointed.
But MEN, men are even worse in the department of infernal affairs. Fat men wear black to disguise their obesity ("Guilty as charged!")... Altitude-challenged men become beefcakes to hide their height (or lack there of)... Older men wear the most colorful drab they can get their withered fingers on at Bathing Ape to look younger (or queerer)... Queer men... Actually queer men are quite honest, to be honest. They dress, talk, walk and act the part. And can you imagine the courage of coming out that straight closet? Ballsy!
And the things we say to each other, what farce!
"Aww... today's your last day? Let's keep in touch!"
"Looks aren't as important to me as chemistry."
"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder."
Umm... no it's not. Megan Fox is universally hot, and Ugly Betty is Ugly freaking Betty. One exception: White men's taste in Asian women. I know they can cook and speak English and everything, but Filipinos? And Lucy Liu? Shit, I'd make fun of her eyes!
"I'm gonna fuck your brains out!"
What? Are you sure you want to do that? Because I sure as hell don't recommend it! Imagine the clean-up afterwards! You've go to change the sheets, pillow casing, repaint the walls the victim is a squirter. It's just going to be an absolute mess.
Horatio and co. will have a field day at that crime scene...